I have been getting the kindest and warmest comments to many of my rather depressing posts. I must make it clear that I'm grateful to all of you and your comments really help me re-orient myself in taking the best decisions. But more importantly, my sister and my brother in law, to both of who I've been rather critical in this blog, have helped me out with some money. My sister also talked me out of trying to get a job until my exam gets over in late November. So, at this point of time, I'm not job hunting. I'll pursue that after my exams.
I'm sure you people are dying to know what happened during the time that I thought about 'whoring'. I had pinged about 15 or 20 different men in Mumbai in my hunt for Sugar Daddies. In amongst them, I got very interesting responses. First of all, only about 8 or nine replied out of which, 2 have already become my friends as they were very surprised that I was selling out my body. I have met one of these guys on GB meets. There is also this amazingly handome man who gives free massage. I might take this option up in the future to enjoy a massage vice versa.
More importantly though, very funny things took place in the exchange with one of the two who were interested in being a Sugar Daddy. The profile name of the guy (I'm not outing this guy and his name sounds like sodomist23) was itself funny. He replied to my first message saying 'Yes.' We exchanged messages and he expressed his intense desire to meet him. All this happened in the span of the day and by evening he wanted to meet up with me at my place. I said that we needed to know each other before meeting. He asked me for my mobile number. I told him that I don't give phone numbers to strangers unless I get to know a person more. That made him furious and he signed off saying 'you are nt courageous... you r wasting my time... don't evr msg me again... bye'.
One of the other guys who could have been a sugar Daddy for me said that he didn't like my beard and that the moment I got it off, I can approach him again. The third guy who responded with a yes to my 'Are you a SugarDaddy' messages hasn't responded to my detailed reply. Another person turned out to be a kind soul and asked me to not sell myself out and face my situation with courage. He also offered his time to talk over a coffee or something if I felt like it.
What I infer from this experience is pretty clear. People really start judging at the time you start selling your ass. Most people don't even want to talk to you if you start asking for money. They would not be willing to listen to your story. At the same time, the people who are interested in this 'whore-call' are usually those who are superficial that they can't let it evolve gradually. They expect me to be a whore and comply to their demands like a slave.
The job hunt series didn't really go well. I have not gotten responses for the few jobs that I did apply for. I have gotten a billion more options to check out thanks to my readers here on the blog. But I have shelved that option until the next important academic landmark in my life. I'll post later on in the day of some very interesting developments on the music front.
21 comments:
Kris, I am happy to know your family is helping you out. Did you read my post on Family Values? Good also to know that you don't have the idea of selling out your body any longer. :) All the best dude. Life throws many things at you. Get a suitable bat to counter all of them. :)
whatever! I think you're a tease, you have this pimp/whore master/servant fantasy that your drawn to and you want to feel like your back is up against a wall and you were forced into some kind of S&M sex/bondage scene to pay the bills. You want it, but you are afraid of wanting" it" more, I say go for it, play out your sexual fantasies, you only have one life, just be careful, find a friend to follow you down a dark alley and then throw you to the ground and F*** your brains out. or pretend you're a hooker and sit on that waterwall thing at kolaba --see how many married men you get to turn around and look at you, its a huge boost to your ego, --maybe even get a friend to pretend to pay you money for sex --see how it makes u feel, its good to have these fantasies, you just have to be careful --worst thing you can do is be a tease and and promise something you have no plan on delivering> If you're going to F*** then F*** don't say you will and then run off and act like you're too good for it. -dh
India Pavan said to use a suitable bat, well I say you
know what you want to do with your bat, just do it.
I'm a huge fan of sex and I'm not ashamed to admit it-all kinds of it, even with girls ( gross!, I know but I just have to close my eyes and not try to gag, girl's are not that bad really, but a poor substitute for a cute guy)--dirty can be safe. -dh
@ IndiaPavan: I'll check it out! Thanks for your comments.
@ Duncan Hines: Hey, look I am not scared. I would do this when I need it so very much. Without the money part involved. Okay? You are being unnecessarily harsh on me I suppose.
@ Hines: You seem to be more of a whore than me - for sex that is!
we're all whores, --I just want you to understand the role fantasy plays in people's lives, don't be afraid of it -dh
@ Duncan: I see the true light now, master!
ur sis is such a dahling..dont let her down :-)
Buddy! I don't know what to tell you, Things wouldn't get so madly bad. nothing unimaginable would happen, Just give time so time. Take care buddy
@ Swats: She has always been I guess!
@ The Seeker: Look, things have already started lloking up!
I would advise u to focus on studies and clearing ur exams this november surely. Medical exams r no joke. So tell me what r u doing? PG in orthopaedics?
@ Reema: Yeah, I'm going to do this after I finish recording one more song!
My Oldest daughter is an exotic dancer. Meaning she takes her clothes off for money. She's very talented & beautiful & makes a good income that way. There is no sex involved or prostitution or even any touching. No matter people will always judge her. It's hard to get out of that life style because the money is better then anything else she has skills for. If you read my last post (Not the one where I break up w/my boyfriend, but the previous one)You will see how her lifestyle got her in trouble.
My point to you is... I'm so glad you did not go that route. Getting into it is a lot easier then getting out of it. Your hard work will pay off. & your sister is wonderful for helping you.
People will judge no matter what, whether ur a prostitute, dancer, waiter, doctor, IT specialist, priest, nun or nothing. thats wut humans r like. :)
Keshi.
Krish??????????
What is this?????
Ridikulous..Girl are ye outta ur mind?
@ Handmaiden: Wow, that was an interesting revelation! I am very curious to know more.
@ Keshi: So, what's your point?
@ MystiueDew: You have obviously not been with me during the 'phase'. Don't freak out girl, I have not yet become a whore!
whoa! what have i all missed?
im so confused!
i love your BOLDNESS kriss...wish i live nearby so i can be of great help...with no strings attached of course! :)
*i cant believe what im reading*
Okay, so now I am not sure what alternate reality you are floating in or what you are smoking! Something mind altering for sure.
"At the same time, the people who are interested in this 'whore-call' are usually those who are superficial that they can't let it evolve gradually. They expect me to be a whore and comply to their demands like a slave."
You want to sell your body (which is the bottom line) but dont want them to treat you like you sold your body? Sugar Daddies or not, they arnt stupid man! They are paying for you. They certainly are not being superficial. This is prostitution in all its glory. Prostitution is not "friends with benefits". It is a mind numbing cold business.
How is the studying going? November looms.
A Well Wisher in NYC
@ Pepe: A lot has been missed by you, I'm afraid. And it's too late to catch up. Boldness or whatever, this is my life.
@ AWWiNYC: Well, look I have had sex with Dads who have offered me respect and adulation. I was looking forward to that I guess.
Studies are taking a backseat this week because of recordings. But they are okay.
"People really start judging at the time you start selling your ass"
True. I must say I judged you when you first brought this up..and I know you! But that's just my Indian middle class mentatilty rearing it's head. I judge people who do drugs, smoke and yes, whor for money.
And that does NOT make me a bad person.
"Most people don't even want to talk to you if you start asking for money. They would not be willing to listen to your story"
I have had men approach me at clubs either offering me money for sex (a pittance!) or asking me to pay for them.
I run. FAR AWAY. And yes, I don't wanna even talk to them or listen to their stories.
Does not make me a bad person.
We place too much of a premium in "judging" people for "judging" us.
@ Vikster: Well, I sure hope everyone isn't like you. And that's a utopian thought.
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