- Feb 14 - The Month before
- Feb 20 - The Week Before
- Feb 21 - The Day of Union
- Feb 22 - The first Day and Night
- ......
- ......
- ......
- ......
- ......
- Apr 14 - The Bucket List
- Apr 15 - Dan in Real Life
- Apr 16 - Inadequacies of life
- Apr 17 - Asimov's 'The Naked Sun'
- Apr 18 - The Spiderwick Chronicles
- Apr 19 - Hope and a little sugar
- Apr 20 - GB Movie fest
- Apr 21 - Vinokur's back
- Apri 21 - Dreaming about books
- Apr 22 - Computer-fucking Problems
- Apr 23 - Realization of unlikeliness
(PS: I would like to hear from the readers of the blog on how they would have reacted to the situation that I was facing in the updates section. This would be insightful and helpful for me I guess. Thanks for reading these posts!)
(PS2: I was thinking of putting all the updates in the chronological order. But that seems like impossible as I get dragged down by the sheer emotional needs of recollecting the situation about a month back. Therefore, with due apologies, the other updates are added as well. I hope you won't mind! ;))
12 comments:
Wow, that was a lot to have happened. Until we get update I can only hope that everyone is well.
When do we get another update?
A well wisher from NYC
After reading the Feb 21,22 updates, I am worried for your and his situations.
This is what I would have done. Called up some favors from fellow doctors at the hospital and got him a neurological exam and an appt with an addiction specialist. Pronto. First thing. This needs more than love and sex and food and A/c's. This sounds more serious. Very serious in fact. I hope he did get the medical attention from someone else.. not you... and that all is well now.
Mumbai is hard on anyone coming in from the West, especially an older person in frail health. Just getting around and daily life will take some getting used to. I have no idea what his life was like in his NYC apt, but could he take charge of the household affairs, start learning a few words of Marathi or Hindi to speak with the maid and just generally have some purpose for the day while you are out. Just hanging in the apt alone is really bad for someone who obviously needs a chemical crutch to get through the day due to health or addiction reasons.
Please let us know how things are.
A well wisher in NYC
Well, I actually managed to do that. But it was too late. I'll get to those updates soon. It's been a hard task to put all these updates together.
Anyway, thanks for your comments.
i have been reading ur blog for over 1.5 yrs,but sorry for never commenting! U really intrigue me!
A rocker, young guy having a fetish for old frail guys!I just cant understant the whole phenomenon.I think there is one more popular blogger(tapak)like u.Anyway,I just want to wish iu all the best to pul lu thro the ordeal.I dunno why i follow ur blog,it is just a matter of habit.
continuing from above:..
I just feel that u shud surround urself with ppl with +ve attitude/energy to cheer u up...sorry,if i am overstepping my boundaries.
g a y hassan at gmail dot com
Thanks for the comments. I'm trying my best ways to cheer myself out of my life right now.
hey kris..
Read your blog last during the times of Mr.Lion. Somehow remembered abt it recently.. and now, read the posts for the last 6months in one go!
I am always gripped by the stories.. Reason: I too am a mallu, in my early 20's, love older men (and only older men!), a professional and a musician too! A cpl of years ago I too had met Mr. Lion on SD.. but cudnt meet him in person thou. And sometime then, had stumbled upon your blog as well.
I am always gripped by the stories.. cuz I think its very close to what I would be writing in my next 5-6yrs.. depending on what choices I may make. Anyway hats off to you on being so open and blunt, abt the rough times in your life.
Having known much abt u through your words.. In my opinion the single most important thing that u could have more in your life is.. Faith. Or being a li'l more specific - Spirituality.
Don't take me for a boring, religiously-blinded kid.. cuz, I'm not!! :-) My life is hectic and there are so many things that I do. A few mts of breathing techniques, or a few mts of meditation.. has worked wonders for me.
Does that sound funny. If so just ignore all of that as a few lines from a funny movie u saw last. Else, if u think its always worth a try, to clean up the mind a li'l.. then do reply.. We'll talk more..
nyways, my sincere prayers and love are with you.. :-)
dev.
PLease do fill us in on how the situation got to where it is now, with Vinokur back in NYC.
In some ways it is a good thing that he is getting the care he needed in a familiar and easier environment. However, I feel badly that you are seperated by time and space for now. I hope you can continue to nuture a mutually caring and supportive relationship even long distance.
I will caution though, that long distance relationships are ridiculously hard. Been there and done that and I bear the well healed scars from that. Good but painful learning experience that helped my interactions in later relationships and then marriage ( I am a straight 40 year old Indian origin woman who works and hangs with mostly gay men for professional reasons... ok so I am also a fag hag... hahaha!).
Do update us.
A well wisher in NYC
Thank you for your comments @ dev and @ well wisher from the NYC
@ dev - I would love to hear from you. And I'll try what you suggested. I go to the gym regularly these days. That is helping me.
@ aWWfNYC - The long distance relationship venture has been hard but it's something that I think I'll be able to manage. Vinokur is such a generous, affectionate, understanding person.
On a different note, I know this is weird, is there any way that you can suggest me to migrate to USA? Like marrying someone there and getting divorced etc? Wild? Yes, I am looking at such options!
Kris, why dont you take the exams, and apply for a residency. Get into the residency matching program and take whatever subject you can get to start with. Dont hold out for Ortho. I have friends who moved from psychiatry, to internal to whatever they were aiming for. Some sujects have easier openings than others. Do the research carefully. It is not ridiculously hard, and is quite doable. There are visa restrictions that may require you to go back to your home country for a year or so after your residency is over before you are permanently placed. I know people who have opted for working in poorer areas of the US for little money (Appalacian mts) in lieu of going back to the home country for a spell. There are ways around it that will provide you with the means to do good work in your chosen field.
If the residency matching program does not work out, you could try coming on a student visa to do a masters or phd in a related field. Someone else I know did exactly that. After completeing her residency in India she came here to study genetics and got a phd. She really wanted to study genetics so it worked for her, but that route is also available.
You are going to have to do some research and work hard for exams etc, but it will work eventually.
You really dont want to get into sticky situations re.. marriage and divorce and such things that are borderline legal. On the other hand you do not want to come here under a visitors visa and work as a waiter or something unconnected with your present work, in any surreptitious way. That would be waste of your talents.
A well wisher in NYC
I am trying all those!
Thanks for those kind, wise words!
I wish I could talk to you about the situation and help you think better.
But I am not sure, if you want to talk.
A well wisher from Canada...JK
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