This is a fucking incredibly beautiful apartment is tastefully furnished and located in a quiet locality. But most importantly, I can be secure in an apartment where the landlord understands the situation perfectly.
The actual search for the apartment stretched for a couple of weeks and was a very mixed one with disappointment and surprising revelations. I was so worried after the first week that I had to type in the following message to the Gay Bombay support group seeking help.
Hello friends,
It's been a long time since I participated in the discussions actively. That can be attributed to my hectic schedule in the past few months of life. That includes finding the love of my life online on a personals website as well!
I would like to introduce myself once more. I'm a 28 year old orthopaedic surgeon living in Mumbai for the last 3 years. I have always been an admirer of older men. So it shouldn't be as shocking as it would have been otherwise when I introduce my 64-year-old lover/boyfriend/partner/spouse/husband who is a linguist/photographer from NYC. We are committed to each other and are planning to settle down in Mumbai.
For that, we are looking for a 1 - 2 BHK apartment in a good locale in Mumbai and I've already seen a few. To my dismay, almost all of the housing societies would pose the question 'Are you married? or ‘Are you a bachelor?' before even getting into the details of the apartment.
On the first exposure to such a derogatory remark (in the terms of marriage defining moral righteousness), I was shocked and outraged. But as always, as we’ve all had to do our entire lives, I took it in my stride and have formulated an answer: 'I'm a bachelor. My friend who is sharing the apartment with me is, too. And we can't afford to have two apartments. We've similar interests which would make it convenient for us to be living together.' That has worked sometimes now. Another thing that has worked is to let these housing societies know that I'm a practicing surgeon/doctor. That somehow salvages a lot of respect in these circumstances.
And then, I had a talk with my sister and an uncle, a father-figure, the only two people in my family whom I've come out to about our plans. Both had their views regarding the 'safety' of settling down in India. Would we face ridicule? Would we be ostracized? Would we be asked to vacate should the reality come to the fore? My boyfriend also suggested that families living in the neighborhood would be curt towards us and be scared of letting the children see us together thinking that they might be 'exposed' to immoral issues. To top it all, would somebody tip us off and would we be legally punished under Sec. 377 IPC? Add to that this hyperbolic age difference between the two of us, the chances of us being discriminated vis-à-vis the 'pedophilia scandal’ which hit the media in a wave of movies like 'Page 3'.
All this has led me to write this letter/request to all of the GB members. I want to ask you for some advice or suggestions regarding a place in Mumbai where we could live. Would anybody know about gay-friendly apartment complexes or dealers/agents who would be gay-friendly? I guess there are at least few gay couples in Mumbai who live together.
I would be grateful to anyone who would like to comment on any aspect of this peculiar problem of ours.
Thanks to all of you for spending your time reading and hopefully, responding to this message.
Regards,
Kris
The whole scene looks brilliant. It seems like I and Alan will be living together in our wonderful new apartment from mid February.
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