Finally, after a long wait of over 700 days, I was at the my college hospital doing some work. Oh, I can't tell you how good it felt! I was a little edgy when I went there. I didn't know if I could fit in to the system to which I was so snugly engaged 2 years back. The first day, or night rather, went very well. I feel like a changed person now while interacting with persons, especially patients. But since I was not officially on duty, I had to keep a check on myself through out the whole time. I have this problem of putting myself under all kinds of rules and restrictions during some occasions where I was uninvited/shouldn't have been present. It's fine to have some kind of restriction always. But I overdo it most of the times. Thankfully, except for the wretched feeling it gives me, it has never back-fired!
It was a very different day/night yesterday. I went back to the 2 movies/day theme. Watched Gladiator on TV in the morning. Again, I fell in love with the magnificience of Rome and the empire. Lovely screenplay, great fight scenes and of course, gorgeous SilverDaddies! Wait a minute! Every movie I love has one or two of these cute older men. Is it because of them that I watch movies? I was able to generalize the question sometime later on in the day. After reading/sleeping till tevening, I switched on the tennis on the tube from the French Open. It was a total mishap of the Ladies singles championship match. I was still enjoying it very much? Why you may ask? What? Not again! Yes, there are a lot of moustached daddies in the spectators that, very curiously, attract the attention of the cameras. They keep on showing such guys between points dammit! Is this why I watch Tennis? Maybe it's not just me. Perhaps, everyone likes them!
After spending the day until about 4 AM at the hospital, I came home feeling fresh. I had decided not to sleep and watched "Braveheart" on DVD. I think the theme is naive but the cinematography deserves some applause. Having seen Gibson's "Passion...", I feel that he makes movies in a similar way.
One more thought that I would like to share with you today. I don't know how many of you interact with so many persons in your professional life. But, my profession is such that a lot of unsuspecting persons pass through my life, as patients, who, under different circumstances, would be ideal persons to have a crush on or start a relationship with. During my internship, I had a lot of feelings with patients. But I tried supressing them not only because I was still uncomfortable about my sexual identity, but also because of the fact that I believe in strict professionalism at work. In the last 2 years or so, I have come out and now am very confident about myself being gay. It's the first time after this that I have worked in a professional enviornment. I saw a couple of interesting men and I stared at them a couple of seconds longer than others. What should I do in such situations? Does anyone have any idea?
The lack of sleep, about a couple of dozen hot men (combined total from TV, movies and hospital) and the pleasure of finding my feet back in my work environment is making me very horny today.
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