The day when I put my life to risk
The occupational hazard of this profession that I'm embracing is huge. Today, I had to single-handedly manage a major case who was HBsAg +ve. The patient was an old case of fracture and the blood loss was considerable. Even though, I wore protective clothing, I came into direct contact with the patient's blood on at least 2 occasions. I hope that doesn't get me infected.
Manohar gets a treat
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My cat, whom I refer to as Manohar Kadam (with pun intended at the whole set of Marathi public that I work with), got a lovely treat today. I was just hanging out for an errand at the road behind the hospital when I saw this pet shop which seemed to have a whole bunch of interesting pet thingies.
I went in to check if it had things for cats. First the guy at the shop denied having any. I still fooled around to check if something was available. After 10 minutes of engrossing searching, I found a packed snack and three toys for Mr. Kadam.
The snack is made of Tuna and is pre-processed. Just need to open it up and lay it on his bowl for munching. The toys have catnip stuffed inside cotton/wooly material. One is a catnip-mouse and the other two are catnip-balls.
He's already crazy about the catnip mouse. The balls are meant for 'fetch' games at the lawn outside the hostel.
Junior screwed my holiday
My colleague had taken a holiday for the Christmas weekend and I was left alone to manage my two irresponsible juniors. That spoilt every plan that I had planned to go out. But what I ended up ultimately doing was to start jamming in my room with my electric guitar and bass guitar. We bought a cheap cable as well from the nearby music store. Hoping to progress a lot mor with the band soon.
Happy Feet
To make up for the sadness surrounding the occassion, I and S. went for the movie 'Happy Feet'. For a standard Pixar movie, it was a let down. Animation was beyond comparison to anything else that Pixar had made ever. But the screenplay and the story were not as good as those before.
But we had a nice time. Tomorrow is a holiday. I hope to do something interesting?
But we had a nice time. Tomorrow is a holiday. I hope to do something interesting?
Band Breakup?
Tonight, we met at Xander's apartment for a jam session. Apart from yesterday's dinner confusion, nothing was wrong. But as usual, Xander was drinking and not really interested in serious jamming. We tried many songs but not even one could reach anywhere.
We even tried the latest song that we were working on so enthusiastically last weekend called 'Severity'. Finally, Xander went away with his glass of rum and soda to the living room to lay down.
This got S.' so pissed (I really don't understand what was the abrupt trigger was) that he said he wanted to leave immediately. He also said to me and Parry (Xander was busy) that there is no future to the band like this. This was around 3 AM.
I tried to make him stay back. But it dawned on me as well that even I was feeling immense frustration regarding the lack of realization of our goals as a band because of the lackadaisical attitude of Xander.
So I also started out with him. I wanted to talk with him about the band and the dream. Finally I ended up driving half way across Mumbai to drop him at his home. During the ride S.' said that he's not going to come for any more jam sessions until Xander changes his whole attitude.
He also said that I can also join in his new band as a bassist as their bassist just left town. That was so relieving. It seems so promsising as well.
But I'm unhappy as a whole. I wanted the band to work with Xander. He's the talent-house, someone who can propel us into mainstream international rock stardom.
We even tried the latest song that we were working on so enthusiastically last weekend called 'Severity'. Finally, Xander went away with his glass of rum and soda to the living room to lay down.
This got S.' so pissed (I really don't understand what was the abrupt trigger was) that he said he wanted to leave immediately. He also said to me and Parry (Xander was busy) that there is no future to the band like this. This was around 3 AM.
I tried to make him stay back. But it dawned on me as well that even I was feeling immense frustration regarding the lack of realization of our goals as a band because of the lackadaisical attitude of Xander.
So I also started out with him. I wanted to talk with him about the band and the dream. Finally I ended up driving half way across Mumbai to drop him at his home. During the ride S.' said that he's not going to come for any more jam sessions until Xander changes his whole attitude.
He also said that I can also join in his new band as a bassist as their bassist just left town. That was so relieving. It seems so promsising as well.
But I'm unhappy as a whole. I wanted the band to work with Xander. He's the talent-house, someone who can propel us into mainstream international rock stardom.
Dinner Mess
S. and family had come back to town a week before. I had been bragging S. about a delicious home-cooked dinner for some time now. Suddenly, that is, yesterday night, S. called me up and said that me, Xander and Parry were invited for a dinner at S.' apartment.
The plan was for us to go together to S.' apartment in a cab. I got a couple of missed calls from Xander and Parry (both taking an off from work, for boozing and gaming) at around 6 pm when I was struggling to awaken from my sleep after a heavy emergency yesterday.
I returned their call at 6.30 pm and told them that I would take until around 8 pm at least before I got free. This was according the plan that Xander had planned yesterday evening. Since both of them were free and ready to start, and since my hospital is practically on the way to S.' apartment, I asked them to come pick me up in a cab.
As usual, Xander had problems with this idea. He wanted me to come home before I started. I requested them a couple of times more in the next hour or so to do it. But still they refused.
Finally, I got free by around 9 pm. I called Xander. He didn't pick up. Then I called Parry. Parry was hanging out with someone (pro'lly his GF) at a mall nearby the apartment. He said that he suddenly was called to join work at 11.30 pm and there was no way he could make it for the dinner. Besides, he told me that Xander was sleeping probably at the apartment as he was also not answering his calls.
I requested Parry to try to at least to turn up. Parry said he'll try. He said he'll go wake up Xander and then start to S.' apartment. I asked them if they could pick me up on the way in the highway? Parry said, it will be difficult.
So, I decided to go by train alone. I thought, fuck.. ltet them come in their own time. I don't want to go in late for a family men with two drunk men.
I got in a cab to get me to the suburban station. It took me fooken 15 minutes to travel hardly a kilometre. In the cab, I get a call from Xander. He asks me where I was. I said I was in a cab going to railway station. He asked me why I didn't call him up. I said I called him but he didn't pick up. I disagreed with me and asked me 'Doc, how can you decide on going alone when we had plans to go together?' I said, you didn't get ready soon enough. He just hung up
Obviously, only I turned up. I had the most satisfying meal of my entire year. WOW. But still S.' and me feel bad about the ever-frequent quarrels between me and Xander.
The plan was for us to go together to S.' apartment in a cab. I got a couple of missed calls from Xander and Parry (both taking an off from work, for boozing and gaming) at around 6 pm when I was struggling to awaken from my sleep after a heavy emergency yesterday.
I returned their call at 6.30 pm and told them that I would take until around 8 pm at least before I got free. This was according the plan that Xander had planned yesterday evening. Since both of them were free and ready to start, and since my hospital is practically on the way to S.' apartment, I asked them to come pick me up in a cab.
As usual, Xander had problems with this idea. He wanted me to come home before I started. I requested them a couple of times more in the next hour or so to do it. But still they refused.
Finally, I got free by around 9 pm. I called Xander. He didn't pick up. Then I called Parry. Parry was hanging out with someone (pro'lly his GF) at a mall nearby the apartment. He said that he suddenly was called to join work at 11.30 pm and there was no way he could make it for the dinner. Besides, he told me that Xander was sleeping probably at the apartment as he was also not answering his calls.
I requested Parry to try to at least to turn up. Parry said he'll try. He said he'll go wake up Xander and then start to S.' apartment. I asked them if they could pick me up on the way in the highway? Parry said, it will be difficult.
So, I decided to go by train alone. I thought, fuck.. ltet them come in their own time. I don't want to go in late for a family men with two drunk men.
I got in a cab to get me to the suburban station. It took me fooken 15 minutes to travel hardly a kilometre. In the cab, I get a call from Xander. He asks me where I was. I said I was in a cab going to railway station. He asked me why I didn't call him up. I said I called him but he didn't pick up. I disagreed with me and asked me 'Doc, how can you decide on going alone when we had plans to go together?' I said, you didn't get ready soon enough. He just hung up
Obviously, only I turned up. I had the most satisfying meal of my entire year. WOW. But still S.' and me feel bad about the ever-frequent quarrels between me and Xander.
Coming of age?
I guess this is not as significant as it seems to me. Today, is the first day when my professor washed up for a surgery with me and my junior without anybody else. There was no Associate Professor, Lecturer, Senior Registrar and so forth. This shows that he has learned to trust me.
Another thing was that I sort of out-thought everyone else in the hospital regarding the diagnosis of the case that I was assisiting my professor. It was a case of a 11 year old girl developing acute flaccid paraplegia with the MRI reports suggesting tuberculosis of the spine causing compression of spinal cord as the cause.
Well, from day 1, I didn't think it was Tuberculosis. I thought it could a tumor. Nothing seemed to fit in. And today, everything fell in place. It finally turned out to be a tumor after all. Bad for the child I guess. But I finally felt siginficantly more important. Something like growing in the hierarchial strata.
Another thing was that I sort of out-thought everyone else in the hospital regarding the diagnosis of the case that I was assisiting my professor. It was a case of a 11 year old girl developing acute flaccid paraplegia with the MRI reports suggesting tuberculosis of the spine causing compression of spinal cord as the cause.
Well, from day 1, I didn't think it was Tuberculosis. I thought it could a tumor. Nothing seemed to fit in. And today, everything fell in place. It finally turned out to be a tumor after all. Bad for the child I guess. But I finally felt siginficantly more important. Something like growing in the hierarchial strata.
The loss is confirmed
Yesterday, Chuck's father expired. Officially. I guess there was no point in continuing the mental agony of the someone on ventilator. I was on emergency duty. Besides, I didn't know what to talk about to Chuck. So I delayed ringing him up till today evening. He talk calmly on the phone.
My Mom thankfully had gone to the functions at Chuck's home. That is glad.
My Mom thankfully had gone to the functions at Chuck's home. That is glad.
Four days since
It's been four days since Chuck's father was admitted. There is no improvement in the condition. I managed to talk to him somewhat more two days back. Yet, I wasn't able to empathize with his condition. Bereavement is difficult to deal with.
Besides that, we've been trying to make a new song. It is untitled yet. We made it with a riff that I had made on Friday. Now, as of today, I've made most of the song on guitar. This sound radio friendly and totally grungy.
Let's hope this turns out to be good.
Besides that, we've been trying to make a new song. It is untitled yet. We made it with a riff that I had made on Friday. Now, as of today, I've made most of the song on guitar. This sound radio friendly and totally grungy.
Let's hope this turns out to be good.
What do I do?
Early afternoon, when I was jamming with Xander and Parry, I recieved a message and a missed call. It was from Chuck. His father was admitted in the Neurosurgery ICU with an intracranial bleed. Comatose. Very bad prognosis.
I tried calling him up. I wasn't sure what to say but thankfully, I couldn't get through. I finally got in touch with him in the night. I didn't have a lot to say. I said that I know what had happened and asked him how the situation was. He said that it hadn't changed.
I don't know what to say. I don't know what to do.
How do I react to such a traumatic incident in one of my best friend's life?
I tried calling him up. I wasn't sure what to say but thankfully, I couldn't get through. I finally got in touch with him in the night. I didn't have a lot to say. I said that I know what had happened and asked him how the situation was. He said that it hadn't changed.
I don't know what to say. I don't know what to do.
How do I react to such a traumatic incident in one of my best friend's life?
Such a bad week
This week was perhaps my worst ever in KEM. One junior had left for his sister's wedding. And other one was acting up strange. He already received a memo for abusing a relative of a patient. I think that was the most foolish thing anyone could do.
Twice in the week, I received scoldings from my senior serious enough to make me feel that I should quit my residency and do something else. This is despite working my ass off to compensate for the lack of one junior.
But I can't just leave and go now. Still I need to face my problems. I want to work and I'm working as hard as ever. But I hate the way things work out in this hospital and I hate my seniors who constantly irritate me.
On the other side, Xander is having issues with his relationship. It's been about 3 weeks since we jammed properly. S. is coming back tomorrow from Kerala. So that might just liven things up. Ray is touring North India and giving a couple of exams.
My father is doing okay. That is also relieving.
And to top all that, for the first time in about 3 years I played with a cat (my cat) in the hospital campus (on a lawn) earlier this evening. So much fun it is!
Twice in the week, I received scoldings from my senior serious enough to make me feel that I should quit my residency and do something else. This is despite working my ass off to compensate for the lack of one junior.
But I can't just leave and go now. Still I need to face my problems. I want to work and I'm working as hard as ever. But I hate the way things work out in this hospital and I hate my seniors who constantly irritate me.
On the other side, Xander is having issues with his relationship. It's been about 3 weeks since we jammed properly. S. is coming back tomorrow from Kerala. So that might just liven things up. Ray is touring North India and giving a couple of exams.
My father is doing okay. That is also relieving.
And to top all that, for the first time in about 3 years I played with a cat (my cat) in the hospital campus (on a lawn) earlier this evening. So much fun it is!
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